Flor de Pascua – Madonna – M.C. Esher

post

How long can the baby blues last?

Five and a half years ago, as spring was just starting, I was at home on maternity leave with my beautiful baby girl. Early troubles with feeding were behind us, and I could spend my days in a gentle rhythm of feeds and naps. After each feed, I would prop her up on my knee, […]

post

Breast is best – or is it?

I firmly believe that breast milk is nutritionally better than formula. It contains natural antibodies from the mother that help the baby to fight infection – something not contained in even the best bottle milk on the market.  I am more doubtful about the studies showing links with everything from increased intelligence to being a […]

post

But the second one is easier, right?

These words were uttered to me by a colleague who was shortly to become a father for the second time. His tone was joking, but I could see the panic in his eyes. He desperately wanted – no, needed – me to say yes. Well, on the one hand… The practicalities are certainly easier. Whereas […]

post

Cyberchondria

My daughters love to play ludo, but I have learned to dread it. In Dutch, the game has the telling name: ‘Mens erger je niet’, loosely translated: ‘Man, don’t get upset’. It is certainly appropriate, because it almost always ends in a furious tantrum, sometimes with board and pieces flying across the room. One of […]

post

What a lovely age!

When I moved to the Netherlands to live, I was given the humorous book, “Act Normal: 99 tips for dealing with the Dutch”. One piece of advice for making conversation with a parent was to ask them how old their child was. No matter what the answer, you should respond with ‘Wat een mooie leeftijd!’ […]

post

Waiting for a smile

Everyone knows that the first months with a new baby are hard. Lack of sleep, a demanding feeding schedule, the stress from a crying baby. Everyone knows that. Of course. But, until you’ve done it yourself, you don’t really know. The punishing schedule is the first part. A newborn baby needs feeding about every three […]

post

It’s not rocket science – unfortunately

‘Rocket science’ is a synonym for ‘terribly hard, perhaps impossible’. I am emphatically not a rocket scientist. But scientific or mathematical problems have never seemed like insurmountable obstacles to me. While, on the one hand, the prospect of making a phone call fills me with panic, on the other hand an equation that needs to […]

post

Gravida 3 para 1

Simply writing the title of this post causes my throat to tighten and a pricking to start behind my eyes. It is probably incomprehensible to most people. It appeared at the top of my pregnancy record when I was pregnant with my second child. ‘Gravida’ is the number of pregnancies the mother has had, including […]

about

Acknowledgements

Thanks firstly to my coach, who turned my life around, and without whom this blog would not exist. Then my partner, for sorting out the sys-admin side of this website, for not cracking up laughing when I mentioned the idea, but most of all for his patience and love in nearly twenty years of trying […]

about

Why ‘The Quiet Wave’?

Ever since I was a child, I have wanted to be good, and win approval. In my early years, this was easy – just be quiet, work hard, and do as I was told. As I grew up, it started to get more complicated. Hard work was well received by my teachers, but made me […]